Monday, March 25, 2013

[FANFIC] I Love You

Cho Kyuhyun




Jessica cried again. The tears fall again like it didn’t want to stop. Jessica, herself didn’t know what to do. She couldn’t control her feeling right now. She felt like what she had been through was only a dream that couldn’t be true. She always hoped when she closed her eyes for a while and opened it up again, all bad dreams would go. But, when she closed her eyes, the face that she really loved emerged. That face emerged again in her vision with a smile that she really missed it.
“Jess, what will happen to us next?” Jessica a little bit jerked with unexpected question from Kyuhyun. Jessica looked at Kyuhyun. She tried to find Kyuhyun’s pupils. Their gazes met for a few seconds before Kyuhyun ran it away.
“Oppa, what are you going to say?” asked Jessica. Kyuhyun shook his head.
“Forget about it! We came here to clear our minds,” said Kyuhyun. His eyes observed the waves crashing the beach. Peace. That what he felt right now. The sense of sea also could make him felt the peace that was dishevelled with problems before came to the beach. Jessica held Kyuhyun’s chin and then pulled it to see Kyuhyun’s face.
“Why?” asked Jessica. Kyuhyun’s gazes were not as usual. Kyuhyun was like having a big trouble. Kyuhyun shook again. This time, Kyuhyun engraved a small smile like he was forced to crave that smile. He tried to deficient Jessica’s worries about him.
“I love you forever,” Kyuhyun expressed his feeling with kissed Jessica’s forehead. Jessica closed her eyes to feel the hotness of Kyuhyun’s kiss. Kyuhyun let his lips on her forehead as he didn’t want to let it go.
“I love you too,” at last Jessica replied even though Kyuhyun still didn’t detach the kiss. Suddenly, a drop of Kyuhyun’s tears fall on her face. Kyuhyun immediately broke the kiss and ran his face from Jessica.
“I want to your face,” remarked Jessica. Kyuhyun shook his head while his hands wiped his rolling tears. At last, Jessica gave in with Kyuhyun’s stubbornness. She hugged Kyuhyun’s back to calm him down.
“I love you,” Jessica whispered again.
At that night, Kyuhyun urged to go to Seoul even it was already late at night. Kyuhyun tried to persuade Jessica to agree with his suggestion with the reason he had a work to do that need to complete it immediately. In the car while they were on the way back, Jessica shut her mouth up to express her protest. Kyuhyun took her hand and kneaded it gently.
“If you felt sleepy, then go ahead,” Kyuhyun spoke slowly to break the silence. Jessica watched Kyuhyun who was driving with one hand and his hand was rubbing her hand gently. Kyuhyun now moved his sight at Jessica. Kyuhyun engraved a sweet smile to her before he focused back at the road. 
Slowly Jessica closed her eyes. Everything went to dark. But no longer after that, Jessica heard the car horned few times. Immediately she opened her eyes up. There was a car in front of them and Kyuhyun didn’t have time to dodge the car. Everything went to dark again in Jessica’s sight.
“I love you,” Jessica heard that voice whispered beside her ears. Jessica opened her eyes slowly. The light that entered her eyes distracting her sight. She blinked her eyes continuously so that her retina could accept the amount of light that entered from the surrounding. She tried to analyse her surroundings.  Weird, where was I?
Jessica tried to find someone that she knew in that room. Her eyes were smaller to see a guy who was laid on the couch at the corner of the room. “Oppa?” called Jessica. Statically, that guy woke up and went closer to her with a happy face and shown his cute small dimple.
“Jess, you woke already?” said Leeteuk while pushed a button on the wall to call the doctor. Leeteuk was so happy until he flew his tears and wetted his both cheeks.
“Where I am?” asked Jessica who still confused. Leeteuk rubbed her hairs gently.
“You are at the hospital, my dear,” said Leeteuk gently. Jessica creased her forehead. Jessica wanted to ask more question to Leeteuk but she couldn’t do it as a young doctor came to check on her. After finished checking her up, the doctor wanted to meet Leeteuk at his room to discuss about her condition.
“Oppa how is Kyuhyun oppa?” asked Jessica after Leeteuk came back. Leeteuk shut his mouth while put the food that he bought at the hospital café after meeting with the doctor.
“If you want me to tell you the truth, you must be strong, understand?” Leeteuk gave a warning. Jessica became confuse with Leeteuk. He took a deep long breath before started talking about Kyuhyun.
“He’s still in comma. Yesterday, he needs to operate to remove the blood clot in his brain. If he didn’t wake 42 hours after his operation, maybe the chance for him to still alive become more decrease,” said Leeteuk. He explained everything from what doctor said to him about Kyuhyun’s condition. Jessica quietly listened to what Leeteuk said. She was in shocked after listened to the bad news. Slowly her tears rolled down and wetted her both cheeks.
“I want to see him, oppa!” Jessica made a request. Leeteuk gave a nod as he agreed.
“Then, I will lend a wheelchair for you. But now, you need to eat,” Leeteuk said while fondled her hair gently. Jessica agreed with Leeteuk’s request even though she didn’t have any appetite to eat after listening to Kyuhyun’s condition. Leeteuk immediately took the porridge that he bought just now.
Leeteuk pushed the wheelchair that he lent slowly into the ICU ward. The sound of machine started to hit the eardrums. Kibum stood as he saw Leeteuk came in with Jessica. He gave a small smile with his sorrow eyes to prove that he was in a grieve condition. Leeteuk replied his smile while Jessica, her eyes already met a stiff body of Kyuhyun who didn’t make any move and full of wires.  
Leeteuk continued pushing the wheelchair to the bed. Jessica took Kyuhyun’s hand and rubbed it slowly. Leeteuk let his sister alone in the ward by asking Kibum to walk out with him. Kibum, who understood, followed Leeteuk’s footstep.
“Oppa,” Jessica whispered slowly. Her tears started to roll down. She really hoped that Kyuhyun would open his eyes then swept all her tears.
“Oppa,” Jessica called him again. She looked at his face that still closed his both shining eyes. Her fingers started to play at his face. She rubbed his cold face slowly. She fall her head at Kyuhyun’s side while his hand still in her grip. She already closed her eyes when she felt someone fondled her hairs. She raised her head immediately.
“Oppa!” quickly swept her tears and then engraved a smile. Kyuhyun also craved a smile on his face. She took his hand and placed it on her cheek.
“What’s wrong, oppa?” asked Jessica. A small smile engraved on his face. Leeteuk took a deep breath before continued his talk.
“Kyuhyun wanted to meet you,” said Leeteuk. Leeteuk hardly tried to remove all the sorrow feeling but he failed to do it. Jessica quickly made her move onto the wheelchair with the help of his brother.
Outside of Kyuhyun’s ward, there were a lot of people waited. Leeteuk pushed the wheelchair into the ward and left Kyuhyun with Jessica alone. Jessica took his hand and fondled it slowly.
“Jess…” called Kyuhyun softly. Their gazes met for a while. Jessica slowly tried to stand up. The mask that supplied oxygen to Kyuhyun was removed from his mouth. Their lips met each other. Both of them closed their eyes to feel the kiss. Jessica broke the kiss and wore the mask again for Kyuhyun. She sat on the bed beside Kyuhyun while rubbed Kyuhyun’s cheek.
“Mi… an… Hae…” Kyuhyun felt had to say it but he still tried it. Jessica shook her head. She tried to endure her tears from coming out. Jessica hardly tried to engrave the smile. Kyuhyun now felt hard to breathe. Soon, the tears started to wet her cheeks.
“Oppa! Oppa! Don’t leave me!” Jessica started to blubber. They who heard the scream from the outside started to enter the ward as fast as lightening. Kyuhyun’s ward was full by his friends and family. Ryeowook, Kibum and Eunhyuk had their wet faces. Leeteuk also had tears on his cheeks. While the others had glassy eyes and tried not to make their tears fall down.
Kyuhyun became more and more harder to breathe. He looked the person who he loved the most one by one. After a few minutes, Kyuhyun finally exhaled out his final breathe. Jessica blubbered out calling for Kyuhyun to open his eyes but it was impossible. Leeteuk quickly came closer to Jessica to calm her down. Leeteuk embraced her to lessen her sorrow. 
“Jess, did you eat?” asked Leeteuk worried. Jessica only stayed stiff and shut her mouth. Leeteuk fondled her hair slowly. He tried to endure his tears when he saw Jessica who full of sorrow and sadness.
“Jessica, my dear, let’s eat, okay?” called Leeteuk but Jessica still didn’t react. Their house bell rang suddenly and Leeteuk quickly went to see who was coming, leaving Jessica alone. Leeteuk took their guest, Sungmin who wanted to meet Jessica. Slowly Sungmin walked closer towards Jessica who sat stiffly on the couch.
“Jess, this is the letter that Kyu left for you,” said Sungmin while handed the letter to Jessica. She felt hesitate to take it. Sungmin gave a smile for Jessica before went to see Leeteuk to hand the letter from Kyuhyun to him. Leeteuk took that Leeteuk and then sent Sungmin to the front door. Sungmin said he needs to meet the other to hand the letter from Kyuhyun either. After Sungmin gone from his sight, Leeteuk opened the letter and read it.
Teukie hyung,
I want to ask apologize from you for all my mistakes that I made since the day we met until the day we separate.  Big thank you for you because took a good care of me and accepted me as your dongsaeng. I want to say sorry because I can’t take care of Jessica like what hyung hoped. I’m so sorry because I made Jessica cry at this time. Hyung, can I ask something from you? Hyung, you must agree with it whatever it is! Hyung, please take a good care of Jessica for me. Hyung, please wipe all her tears that fall because of me. Hyung, please find the happiness for her. Hyung, take care of yourself too. Whatever happened, hyung is my best world hyung ever! 정수야! 고맙고 사랑한다! (Jungsoo ya! Neul gomabgo saranghanda!) (Jungsoo ya! I’ve always been grateful to you, I love you!)
His tears dropped one by one when he read it. The years of memories with Kyuhyun slowly played in his mind. Now, there was no evil Kyuhyun who didn’t listen what the older said. No mere Kyuhyun who always with his rude words. No more Kyuhyun’s voice that melodious, mellifluous and can melt every heart who listened to him singing. There was no mere dongsaeng who really spoilt and pampered.
Leeteuk wiped his tears and went to see Jessica. She was not in her place anymore. He started to get panic and quickly searched her around the house. Leeteuk released a relieved breathe when he saw Jessica ate at the kitchen. He monitored Jessica’s action from far. Was she read the letter already? That question kept playing on his mind. Leeteuk immediately went to the living room when he remembered there was a letter on the couch. Leeteuk took the letter and read it.
My lovely Jessica,
Don’t cry, baby! You know right that I didn’t like to see you cry? Mianhae. Take care of yourself. Don’t let Teukie hyung worries about you. Smile… that the best thing to heal your wound that I made. I’m sorry again because I left you alone. I love you, but this is our destiny. We can’t do anything to stop this from happening. You just met me for a while in your live. Go; find your own happiness without me! Don’t leave in the sorrow life anymore! Please, my dear! Don’t cry anymore. I hurt when see you cry. J
Was this the reason? Leeteuk placed back the letter at its real place. He went to the kitchen to get Jessica.
“Oppa!” called Jessica with happy tone. Leeteuk smiled when looked at her.
“Why?” asked Leeteuk while lifted his both eyebrows.
“Sorry for making you worried and trouble,” said Jessica. A small smile engraved on her face.
“It’s okay! What is important now, you need to eat and be healthy. Then oppa will not worry about you anymore. Get it?” Jessica nodded like a small kid who received commands from her parents.
“Great! Then, finish your food!” Leeteuk gave a command.  
~three years later~
All eyes were watching over her. Jessica looked beautiful with the long white dress that designed by herself. She was accompanied by his oppa, Leeteuk walked slowly on the long stage. At that moment, Changmin smiled brightly when he saw his beautiful bride. Jessica also engraved a smile to reply his.
Suddenly, Jessica saw a figure of Kyuhyun standing beside Changmin. He smiled at Jessica. ‘Oppa, I will never forget you. You are my first love that I won’t forget it and I will remember it until the end of my breath. Thank you oppa for giving me hope and motivation,’ Jessica whispered slowly in her heart. Soon, the figure was missing.
When they were in front of Changmin, Leeteuk handed Jessica’s hand for Changmin to take it. Softly Changmin took Jessica’s hand and hold it.
“Will you take this woman as your wife with full of your heart, take a good care of her, be beside her even sun or rain and do your responsibility as husband and father of her children?”
Without hesitate, Changmin answered, “I do!”
“Will you take this man as your husband with full of your heart, take a good care of her, be beside her even sun or rain and do your responsibility as wife and mother of her children?”
Jessica took a deep breath before answered it. “I do”
“Now, I exclaim you as husband and wife,” Jonghyun came and handed in the rings for Changmin. Changmin slowly pushed the ring into the Jessica’s forth finger. Jessica also did the same thing.
“You may kiss your bride,” slowly Changmin’s lips met with Jessica’s. Their lips met for a while. The flash lights from the camera didn’t disturb them. Soon, they broke the kiss and gave a look at the guests who came today. They gave a deep bow to the guests as respect.
“Jessica, you are my first and last love. I’m happy when see you smiling,” Jessica like heard Kyuhyun whispered beside her ears. Jessica engraved a smile. Thank you, Cho Kyuhyun.
-the end-